Let the Fear in
by Hunter of Artemis101
Summary: "The fear was real. And I knew I had to deal with it. So I just made a choice. I'd let the fear in, let it take over, let it do its thing, but only for five seconds, that's all I was going to give it. So I started to count: one, two, three, four, five. Then it was gone." The fear was controlling her, as the car sat underwater. Then she thought- Jason. She had to save him. Somehow.


_"The terror was just so crazy.  
So real.  
And I knew I had to deal with it.  
So I just made a choice.  
I'd let the fear in, let it take over, let it do its thing, but only for five seconds, that's all I was going to give it.  
So I started to count: one, two, three, four, five. _

_Then it was gone."_

There's the sharp, slick turn downhill. Then a big thump. Then _nothing_. Absolutely _nothing._

Some sort of peacefulness flows within her, from the nothingness. She had never seen so much nothing. She had never had nothing before. There was always _something. _Always. So she shuts her eyes tighter, feeling herself drift away with the ignorance of it all. She doesn't care what's happening. She hears screaming. Agonizing ones. Insane ones. So she lets herself drift away. Drift away with the nothingness.

"Thalia!" His familiar voice rings over the fog, over the ignorance; the nothingness. His familiar features are memorized in herself. In memories. That slight curve of the nose, of disgust, that he had gotten from her. That neat blonde hair from Hades knows where. The awkward toddler legs, running around the house, begging her to play with him. Those bright blue eyes, that mimic her own. Jason.

An emotion takes hold of her, she doesn't know what it is. It's so bittersweet, sorrow filled, and yet it's confident, as if it's pushing her foreword.

The pain felt like it was igniting her body on fire, though. Her mental screams of agony raged on. Her head throbbed with such intensity that she just wanted to drift away again. But she, Thalia Grace, tried her best to hold on, as the images of who she cares about flickers through her mind. And there's only one image; Jason.

A new voice speaks into her, with these new feelings; _save him. Save Jason. _ When her intimidating, electrifying blue eyes do open though, it's blurry. Everything. Glassy and watery. And dark, it's almost pitch black, except for the blue glow that shines through the car, from the water.

She tries to breath, but ends up choking on the icy, cold water. It's so cold, it feels like someone's stabbing her, over and over, with knives. Startled, she glances around, taking in these abrupt changes. Underwater. Almost completely and entirely.

She lifted her head out of the water, that was furiously filling up the car, in heavy gushes through the cracks of the doors, or anywhere else that it could greedily feed into.

She's never liked water. It was too wild. Unpredictable. Distasteful.

"Thalia!" Jason wails, from his car seat. The five year old glances, at her his blue eyes wide with confusion and hints of innocence.

It's okay, she wants to tell him. But she's so disoriented. Everything is swirling around in her head.

Then she realizes what happened.

The car, the lake, the road. _The crash._

No, no, no.

So this is how it all ends, a voice in the back of her mind chides. This is how the invincible, powerful, demigod Thalia Grace takes her last breath.

"Mommy!" She sobs desperately, as the water flushes into her mouth, as she leans down to yell. There's no answer so she analyzes the front seat, feeling Jason's eyes burning into the back of her head, that's bleeding uncontrollably. She ignores the pain coming from it and focuses on the empty front seat. Wait, empty?

"Mommy?" She murmurs, in puzzlement. She was gone.

Wasn't she in the front seat moments ago? Yelling and cursing at her, through chugs of beer? Threatening to kill her? It didn't matter. She needed her mother. She loved her mom, despite all the malevolent, horrible, cruel, abusive things that she did to her.

Then everything is placed down, in a completed puzzle, in an abrupt motion.

All the death threats her alcoholic, drug addict mom had given her. Maybe her mother had finally cracked, and purposely drove the car off the road. And dived out of the car, that was going to be where her children perished.

Could drunk people have quick enough reflexes to dive out of the car, fast enough?

Something squeezes at her chest. It doesn't matter. Nothing does anymore.

"MOM! GOD NO! I NEED YOU" Thalia screeches loudly, over and over again. Over and over again, the water splashes into her mouth, causing her to splutter and cough. Causing her throat to burn.

"Mommy!?" She knows she won't call back.

"Mom?!" She knows it, yet she continues to call out, the water still filling up the car, at a tremendous rate. She feels the blood pool down the side of her face.

"Momma?" Her voice slowly dies down to a whisper, trembling and cracked. She isn't coming for her.

No one's coming.

"Help me, Thalia!" Jason cries, as the car completely fills to the top.

_Help me, Thalia._

A sudden determination took over her. She didn't need her alcoholic mother to rescue them. Truth was, she didn't need anyone. But Jason needed someone.

But she was just too scared. To afraid. To fearful.

He paralyzed her. At least she thought the fear was a he. Held her down, controlled her like a puppet. Made her mind shut off, so it was in an automatic shut down. Clenched his fist at her heart, as if saying _you're going to die, slowly and painfully. And there's nothing you can do about it. _She felt her lungs slowly dry and shrivel, and tried to gasp for air, greedily, hungrily. All she breathed in was the icy liquid. The water. All she breathed in was fear.

She was pretty sure she had learned about fear from her teacher before. Her teacher. She doesn't remember his name. She's to sleepy. From the fear, the numbness of the water, the suffocation. But a memory does ring out, fresh in her mind. Her teacher, who's formal job was a doctor. She remembers what he said.

_"Well, fear's sort of an odd thing. When I was in residency my first solo procedure was a spinal surgery on a __sixteen__ year old kid, a girl. And at the end, after thirteen hours, I was closing her up and I, I accidentally ripped her dural sac, shredded the base of the spine where all the nerves come together, membrane as thin as tissue. And so it ripped open and the nerves just spilled out of her like angel hair pasta, spinal fluid flowing out of her and I... and the terror was just so crazy. So real. And I knew I had to deal with it. So I just made a choice. I'd let the fear in, let it take over, let it do its thing, but only for five seconds, that's all I was going to give it. So I started to count: one, two, three, four, five. Then it was gone. I went back to work, sewed her up and she was fine."_

Counting, she wearily thought, as the fear continued to rush through her, filling her up, just like the water.

_1- "Thalia, I cut myself!" Jason sobbed, holding up his bloody arm, as if it was his lifeline. It gushed scarlet red, and Thalia paled. She took a deep breath and swallowed her emotions down._

_"What? That's nothing. I've had plenty worse, but we got to get the shard of metal out." She has had worse, but that wound was really bad._

_"Thalia!" Jason complained , his voice changing to a higher pitch, recoiling his hand. "Won't that hurt?" Thalia gave him a gentle smile, as she rummaged through her duffle bag. She got out pliers and some ambrosia squares. _

_"Maybe a little. But then you'll get a nice big scar, to show off to your friends. You can say you fought a bad guy, with your favorite __Transformer __or something." Jason grinned, not even noticing the sharp pain of the metal shard being pulled out. _

Her eyelids closed, exhausted, but stays firm, knowing she has to finish counting.

_2- "Aw come on Jason, that's the fifth one you've had." Jason crossed his arms, in protest. _

_"More."_

_"More, huh? Don't come crying to me if you puke." She replied diligently and handed him another ice cream packet. Two minutes later he puked. Two minutes later he came crying back to her. Two minutes after that he asked for an ice cream cone. Responsible or irresponsible, she just couldn't say no._

She doesn't dare glance over at Jason, not now. Not until the counting is over. Not until the fear is over and done with.

_3- Smack. Slash. Shatter. Those were the sounds her mother made, as she slapped Thalia across the face. Slashed her with her nails. Threw a pot at her, which she dodged. _

_"Thalia?" Jason murmured, his eyes wide, after her big fight with her mother. "Is mommy bad?" Hell, yes. She thought patching up her cut up face. _

_"No. She's just sad." She said numbly, slapping on a bandage and ripping into her ambrosia, greedily with her teeth. "Very sad." _

_"Why?"_

_"Because- just because. But she loves you very much. Very, very much." She's not sure if that part is true or not, but she says it anyways. Jason stared at her for a moment, a questioning look on his face. "Maybe we could make her a card. Then would she be happy?" Thalia shook her head, her spiky hair, hitting the sides of her cheeks, stinging them. _

_"I don't think so buddy. But you could make a get well card for me." She gestured to her scratches and Jason beamed, eagerly taking out his crayons._

She hopes there's enough time, as the water pressures to her chest.

_4- "He's in kindergarten!" She hissed, gripping the side of the chair. "So what if he got in a little fight?!" The principle sighed, staring at the young girl, whose face was mimicking a tomato. _

_"It sets a bad example for the other kids." He exclaimed, looking a bit intimidated by the thirteen year old, scowling up at him. "And-"_

_"I really don't give a shit! That other brat wouldn't give him his crayon back, and that crayon belongs to Jason!" She paused for a moment, catching her breath. "That other brat totally had it coming!"_

_Later she tells Jason, "next time, bend your fist a little more. That way it won't hurt as much, and it'll do some collateral damage." He grins at her, and Thalia grins back, slightly scared she's said the wrong thing, because he's grinning mischievously the same way that she does._

Her heart begins to pound slower. She isn't sure if it's because the fear is running out, or her life is. She isn't sure she wants to know.

_5- "Where daddy go?" Her stomach curls. That question was bound to come up, and she knew that, but it still felt like a punch to the chest. _

_"I don't know, Jason. I don't know." She managed to him. She did know. She knew who he was. But she would lie to her little brother, Jason. Over and over again. Because she loved him. And she would always protect him._

_Always._

Then it was gone, she realized suddenly. Completely and utterly gone.

She blinks, and unbuckles the seatbelt, knowing she has to work fast. She pushes her arms, swimming towards Jason, slightly glad she had learned how to swim in school. She blows out, bubbles forming through the 'o' in her lips. Her vision blurs and she just wants to stop working. But she knows she can't.

Jason's unconscious in his car seat, a scrape across his forehead. It isn't bad from her view, but she isn't one hundred percent positive. She unbuckles him and prays to her father, to help them. To let her stay awake, just enough time to save Jason.

_I don't care if I die, she prays mentally. Just let me live long enough to save him, your son, Jason._

She wraps her arms around Jason and pulls him up, out of the seat and into her tight arms. She then, conquered up all those emotions wrapped inside of her. She tries to form a ball of lightning that she had learned a few months ago. It hisses, and even she can hear it through her ringing ears. Then it dies underwater. She almost cries out, then remembers last minute, that she's underwater.

_Underwater._

The water, that's why her lightning isn't working.

But there's no fear. She had already faced the fear. She hugs Jason's unconscious body tighter. It was over, but she wasn't afraid.

As she feels her brother's presence on her shoulder, she thinks that this might not be a bad way to go. It's plenty better than dying by a monster's hand.

But Jason had to live.

So she tries again, and again.

Because she, Thalia Grace, loved Jason.

And she would always protect him.

Always.

_"So I started to count: one, two, three, four, five. _

_Then it was gone."_

**A/N: I'll let your imaginations figure out what happens next. Do they die? Do they live? I'm leaving that up to you, dear readers. I was inspired to write this after watching the show **_**Lost **_**for the first time, then watching **_**The Vampire Diaries **_**Elena's death scene. I hoped you guys like this! I also do not own PJO, Lost, or TVD.**

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